celebrating my first comment
feel like i've entered a new era
like maybe i've realized a very significant/monumental goal

feel moderate success permeating my being
feels warm and fuzzy like cliches do

feel as if my spirit has been lifted
also feel a slightly to mildly vague feeling of validation

feels difficult to maintain a consistently serious facial expression due to "bein' smiley"

feel like maybe my blog needs more statistically relevant and demographically appealing charts, also some sociologically significant pictures

just checked stat counter again
now have 6 hits
feel slightly better about myself
feel like i may be breaking the niche
maybe breaking it all the way through to the mnstrm
feel good again
feel urge to document my ups and downs in an increasingly repetitive manner, also fairly to relatively constantly

my mom just tried to convince me that eating dinner was a meaningful and authentic experience
can't believe she tried to turn my favorite popular blog memes against me
can't believe my parents
wish that they got/understood me
feel odd/disappointed that i came from their stock

feel bad for their/my genes
feel like i will never break 5'8"///if i did i would be the tallest in my nuclear and also extended family
feel like shit
feel like maybe i won't be viewed as "hip" or that new "indie" thing due to my genetic predisposition toward large calves///i can't wear skinny jeans
:'(



feel sick inside
like maybe i could throw up in my mouth a little
except i have acid reflux (genes again)
and this is more or less normal behavior

don't know how i feel about this

according to stat counter i have a total of 5 views so far
feel like this means:
-i have really reached an audience
-maybe i am making it big time
-maybe i have a blog future
-maybe i am bloggable afterall

feel like i am well on my way to becoming a blogosphere fixture
maybe i will become viral
maybe life is looking up

hope i am not just a niche though
hope i am universally appealing
feel like life is potentially looking up, but also potentially down
feel like i need some time alone

"feel like this post is what 43-87% of my conversations entail"

when i am in college i think i will maybe act slightly to extremely different from the way in which i currently act, though i may possibly preserve the language/nature of my internal monologue so as to stay "true to myself"

think i maybe will go through a phase in which i unironically use words and phrases like "creative/artist/poet", "core of my being", and "sacrosanct" in order to refer to myself/activities and/or behaviors i endorse
think i maybe will go through a phase in which i "like a lot of grrls at once/they are not repulsed by or neutral towards me"
think maybe i will go through a phase in which i "am comfortable being who i am"/"am unashamed of my friends"/"learn to appreciate what i have"

feel like i will never talk to the people i meet/befriend in the third phase ever except maybe awkward exchanges in the local store or something

feel slightly to moderately "depressed" about the prospect of confronting relics from my phases and maybe having "awkward situations" that i "thought i grew out of" on my hands

wish i had more readers
wish they were people i don't know
wish this weblog were going places
wish i were going places (is it more grammatically correct to use "was"/don't know)
feel like i have no future
feel like i fall into being one kind of person in public interactions
when in reality i am not that person and also maybe kind of despise that kind of person just a little
feel like i am entombed in drywall, also do not have a way out///is that considered a legitimate feeling/metaphor

afraid/worried that there may be some confusion as to "the purpose of this blog"
afraid that people will think i am "trying to be funny/witty/maybe cute"
feel like clarification is necessary///am 35-67% sure that maybe this will not seem as necessary within the next 2-387 hours/will feel "dumb"

this blog just is my internal monologue/thoughts/i don't know an appropriate name, written down as it happens
don't think it actually means/tries to be anything/"it is not sentient anyway"

just over a day of blogging
one follower
probably zero readers
maybe i should blog about what i am doing
and not how i feel

maybe

am currently in the process of feeling noncommittal
am feeling similar emotions to those i would feel if i were halfway over a fence, with one leg on each side
crotch/thigh pain excluded (is that an emotion)

am feeling ambivalent
is ambivalence different from neutrality
i don't know

addendum to below

feel like this follower is one of those people who follows everyone
feel less international/present in the blogosphere than i did previously
feel like maybe i will keep blogging about my deep insightful opinions
and also my emotions/how i "feel"

hey i have a follower

his/her (i don't know which yet) name is
"opinion cubana"

i feel like i don't know any people from cuba
does this mean i have "broken through" to the blogosphere
does this mean i have gone international

feel like the future is maybe a little bit brighter

(feel like maybe the key to becoming a fixture of the blogosphere is to generate actual/typical content/talk about life events/write something "creative")

-----------------

feel like i won't fit in at my college
because everyone else is a bro

feel like they like to party/drink
but i will drink alone or something, if at all

feel like i am not going to have very many friends
but maybe the education will make up for it

feel like the only one majoring/minoring in my fields of study
because everyone else is into sociology/psychology

feel like people who are into those fields
are probably pseudointellectuals

feel like their facebook pages list interests that aren't their real interests
but are calculated to fit into the sociology/psychology student archetype (ie the pseudointellectual)

feel like they say they like things like "people" or "life" or "philosophy"
or that they are "a walking contradiction"/"very deep"/"interesting"

feel like if i did this i would maybe mean it as a sarcastic jab at this type of person
but they are not self aware enough to be capable of this sort of thing

feel like i am too interesting/unique/self-aware for friends next year

feel obligated to update this in order to justify my internet/blogosphere presence
feel like i should seize the day, but in blog form
is there a latin phrase for that
probably not
portmanteau proposition:
carpe bloggem
feel as if that was dumb/not very creative



feel like i maybe make alot of posts all the time

does quantity make up for quality?




i hope not since i have no readers
going on less than twelve hours since b(log)irth

how the hell do you do one of those crying frowny guys

:'(

is that it
feel like he has a mole

less than a day into blogging
still no followers
feel very emotional
but also nondescript/neutral
feel very tired
maybe this is what the 21st century should feel like
do millenials feel emotions
don't know

feel like i need some followers
feel like that isn't a legitimate emotion

feel like it is now