feel very tired, also moderately to extremely waterlogged
wish the rain would fall in amounts less copious

coming progressively closer to 100 hits, though 'when was i not'
can't wait until the day on which i will meet the number 100
then, surpassing it,
move progressively farther from it

feel like this will lend my life some meaning


but what about meaning

when faced with the absurdity of life in an indifferent universe, why/how does one find meaning?

when faced with the absurdity of life in an indifferent blogosphere, why/how does one find meaning?

feel uncomfortable asking such questions
feel mildly to healthily afraid of being perceived as a 'pseudointellectual bro who's down for a 'deep' conversation about philosophy'

feel like my blog maybe kind of sucks just a little bit
but also like i should "just keep pushing" for reasons that elude me
but are definitely and undeniably tied to getting "a large amount of hits"

maybe the desire for "mad/many hits" is more than just a need to feel "acknowledged internationally"/"world famous" via internet

maybe "going viral" is more than just a petty schoolboy dream

think on some level maybe shakespeare/miscellaneous greek and roman people wanted to 'go viral'

you know how we infer the existence of black holes via their effect on other things
feel like i have a thought with similar properties

ie i don't know it yet but i am aware of its presence
and if i can think it then maybe i will gain insight re going viral

feel like maybe my blog needs more statistically relevant and demographically appealing charts, also some sociologically significant pictures